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FootballDocs 7th Annual Cheerleader Rankings
2009 NFL Cheerleader Rankings
Original Release: January 28, 2010
Well, your fantasy season is over. If you were the champion of your league, congratulations are in order. However, the season is over for the winners and losers all the same. Now you only have a few games of the NFL playoffs to keep you satisfied before the long drought of the offseason. These are tough times for all fantasy football fanatics. However, there is one small glimmer of sunshine, one last fond memory that the 2009 NFL season can leave with us - FootballDocs 7th Annual Cheerleader Rankings. The 2009 rankings are coming out late, but there is a very good reason that will be revealed later.
As always, these rankings are compiled by inspecting every cheerleader web page in the NFL. Squads are ranked based on the quality of uniform, quality of website, and quality of "quality." And yes, we still cannot resist crunching the numbers with our own special formula to provide the best of the best that the NFL has to offer.
Before the rankings kickoff, we would like to do a quick public service announcement: There are some NFL teams out there that do not have cheerleaders. To those teams, we plead to stop the madness. This little experiment has obviously failed. Does anyone really believe that the Jets would have been able to make their playoff run had they not gotten cheerleaders a couple of years ago? Exactly! This list of reasons for having NFL Cheerleaders on every team is growing. Please do your part to help stop the insanity by contacting your favorite NFL team. Now that we have said our peace, let's get on with FootballDocs 7th Annual Cheerleader Rankings.
10. Cincinnati Bengals (Last year - Not Rated)
FootballDocs denies any accusations that the shortest skirts ever had anything to do with the Ben-Gals cracking our top 10 for the first time. In 2006, we gave the Ben-Gals the award for most improved. This group has come a long way. The Cincinnati Bengals' fans had a good NFL season and an AFC North Championship to be proud of, but they can also be proud of the fact that their cheerleaders can be a source of team pride. The site is much improved, the photo selection is much better, but the uniforms have gotten much better. This group should continue to work hard because they still have some room to make improvement. However, this ranking represents several seasons of hard work.
9. New England Patriots (Last year - 6)
An attempt was made to redo their uniform, and unfortunately it was a move in the wrong direction. We know it is cold up there, but that is no excuse for substandard uniforms. This is the NFL, you need to bring a little more "pop" to the table. These uniforms just feel dull and gray. The last thing fans need to see on a cold New England day is a drab uniform. The cheerleader database is fairly searchable, but there needs to be some serious work done on personalizing each cheerleader's page. There is a clear distinction between the bottom squads on these rankings and the top squads. The Patriots Cheerleaders still have some room to improve.
8. Washington Redskins (Last year - 8)
Not afraid to show their stuff, this crew puts the skins in Redskins. The Redskins are a group that always seems to be ready to take it to the next level, but they haven't been able to pull it all together. In 2004, the Redskins Cheerleaders ranked 5th, but the squad has been on a steady slide since then. One of the big holes in the Redskins Cheerleading unit is the website. There needs to be a much cleaner site that can be navigated by the fans. Some of the photo resolution is also substandard. We like the fact that the Redskins are trying to do some interesting things with their uniforms, but something about the shorts and the top just don't seem to jive. Still, there are some very good things going on with some of the Redskins uniforms. They just need a little more quality control. The 70s vibe is a solid strategy for the Redskins. The squad's roster page has all of the girls in silhouettes to give it a Charlie's Angels feel.
7. Denver Broncos (Last year - 7)
The shortest skirts in the business are now the second shortest skirts in the business since the Ben-Gals have gotten desperate. However, these uniforms still deliver a solid punch. If the Broncos could ever get their act together on the website, this group could really shine. To the Broncos' credit, they have been improving their site over the years, but they need to keep going. The odd thing about the Broncos is they chose Denver locations for calendar photos as opposed to the tropical locations that other teams use. We aren't sure how we feel about that.
6. Philadelphia Eagles (Last year - 9)
Philly made a strong push several years ago, but the entire squad has collapsed on top of itself and is no longer a contender for the top few slots. While they do have some quality still in the crew, as a whole, it is just not cut from the same thread has before. Also, we appreciate the Eagles trying to have their own style of uniform, but the tops to their uniforms could use a little work. They do have some calendar photos, and they do have a video profile on each cheerleader. Most of the top cheerleading groups do this as a way for the fans to connect with their favorite NFL franchise. The Ealges are in the ballpark, but they need to pick up their game.
5. Houston Texans (Last year - 4)
If these were fantasy football rankings, we just experienced a tier break. The quality in the top five compared to the rest of the NFL is substantial. The Texans webmaster gets props for dishing out a video intro that immediately gets your attention. This crew has been making strides up the rankings the last couple of years, but just when you think they have got things figured out and corrected the gym shorts look, they go and mess up the tops. This group is neck-and-neck with the rest of the top 5. If they can perfect their uniforms, they could be ready to jump up the rankings a few slots. While we admire the approach in uniform style with the "athletic" them, those tops need a little work. Overall, they have a decent site that you should enjoy. They also get a bonus point for a set of twins.
4. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (Last year - 2)
"Yo ho, yo ho a pirate's life for me!" Hey, it is the Raiders' fault for not capitalizing on the pirate wench them first. This might be the Raiders biggest blunder for a franchise that has had a lot of them. The Buccaneers hit a home run with the variety of pirate-themed uniforms. The girls are outstanding, the uniforms are original and near perfect, and the site is clean and smooth! What more could you want? The top 4 teams on the rankings are all so close that any of them could take over the top slot at any time. This squad might feel like new upstarts, but they have been doing it for years.
3. San Diego Chargers (Last year - 6)
This crew will get anyone charged, and their combination of a host of beautiful girls wearing a cheering outfit with negligee undertones to it will leave any red-blooded male screaming for more. The website navigation is a bit off. We expected more because we feel like these girls could reach # 1. You have to have the total package to reach # 1, and the Chargers missed by the slimmest of margins. However, don't deny yourself a trip to visit the Charger Girls.
2. Dallas Cowboys (Last year - 1)
Now you see why there was such a delay in the release of these rankings. The Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders have been dethroned. Make no mistake this group is still in the best of the best, but they sat back on their laurels just a little too much. The site is still outstanding, and it has tons of photos and videos for all of the fans. However, when you are king of the hill, you have to keep striving to be #1. Did the new stadium, cage dancing at the games, and huge jumbotron go to the girls' heads? Maybe.
1. Miami Dolphins (Last year - 3)
The ladies of South Beach always put on a show, and this year is no different. The Dolphins Cheerleader page looks great. There are lots of photos for every girl. The webmaster/design team for the Dolphins' webpage have really outdone themselves. The whole site is fresh and fun. You can't just be all flash with no substance. The Dolphins Cheerleaders have plenty of that. Be it the great swimsuit photos, the South Beach inspired uniforms, or the sun kissed girls of Miami, this squad has it all. Congratulations to the Miami Dolphins Cheerleaders for winning the Super Bowl of Cheerleading to become the #1 squad in FootballDocs 7th Annual Cheerleader Rankings!